Your husband may chafe at the changes surrendering brings to your marriage at first, and try to get you to go back to the old ways by using bait.
Do your best to avoid giving him advice, even if he asks for it. He may squirm or complain, but he’ll always figure things out eventually. If your husband asks what he should do, deflect the question by encouraging him to do whatever he thinks he should do. Each time you resist the temptation to “bite the bait”, congratulate yourself on your progress. (pg. 125)
Now, I know what you are thinking “but as his First Officer he needs my opinion!”. This is not about surrendering to doormat hood it is about not falling back into old habits. At first when we surrender he can be just as lost as we are. It’s tempting to go back to taking the lead in things when he asks for our help. Instead let him know that you know that he can handle it on his own. Just remember- he either knows what to do or will figure it out. Not allowing that to play out is continuing on in your pre-surrender life.
Related GBG posts:
NOTE: Next week we will not be having book updates. I want to give people time to catch up. I’ll see you the Monday after next!