The premise is still the same from earlier- sometimes you’re just not feeling your best and simple tasks have now become akin to climbing Mt. Everest. This can be just a down time for you or you could be sick or injured. Regardless there are some “bare bones” things you can do to keep on track in our relationships, to still tend to them even if you are sick in bed.
Relationship Bare Bones
- Stay physical. Kiss if you can, hold hands, cuddle, stroke his arm… Just keep up with loving physical contact. It means a lot to him, trust me.
- Stay positive. Nothing can strain a relationship quite like constant negativity. Stay positive with your significant other about what is going on and your lives in general. Smile often, joke around, be playful. Try and stay kind and gentle, as well. Out of all of these this is probably going to be the hardest. When you feel down you act down. Just try your best and I’m sure your man’s understanding will make up for the rest.
- Take interest in him. It’s easy to make things all about you and you certainly should be caring about and for yourself! But don’t forget about him. Listen to him tell you about his day, let him know you are thinking about him.
- Be sexy. No, really. This doesn’t mean putting on your best lingerie and letting him have his way with you (necessarily…) but you can still be sexy without those things. Ideal? Hardly. But there is still power in the sly smiles that send a clear message or naughty little whispers/emails/text messages “I wish I could… until you… and then we’d…”. Don’t shy away from planing a good time, either, and in great detail “Next weekend we should…”
- Ask for help and accept it. It can feel like you are going against everything you stand for when you ask your man to take on some, most, or at times all of your duties while you are down but it really can be necessary. Let him help you and don’t be afraid to ask him for it. Surprisingly enough this could help improve your relationship, your level of intimacy.
- Be open and honest with him. Don’t put on a brave face and don’t “stay positive” yourself into blatant lying. Let him know what is going on with you. The truth is he needs to know these things so that he can act accordingly and in case things take a bad turn. I have a real life example of how not being completely honest about how you are feeling can make things end up badly over at my blog.
Bonus: Know your limits! Express them clearly and tactfully. There is no point in overextending yourself. Not only could this hinder the healing process and keep you down longer but it could also strain your relationship by causing you to feel resentful and him to feel misled (because you should have told him the truth) and frustrated. But it’s not enough to know your limits you have to actually stay in them. All too often we don’t want to be down so we act as if we’re not. Horrible idea! Give yourself time and space. It’s really better in the long run.